I’m Frozen this Winter

We are on schedule to be the 2nd coldest February on record.  Hooray!!  NOT!
As I get older I notice how much I am affected by the cold.  I don’t like it.  I don’t want to go out.  I like to sit in the sun in my living room and bask.  Today I am typing away with my orchid blooms dangling above my iPad and the sun shining on me.  I’m dreaming of the ocean and the lush tropics.  This Canadian winter is not meeting my needs.

Kid 3 is still in hockey and apparently it would be life crushing to miss playoffs to go to Mexico.  My birthday trip to Scotland this spring is on hold.  Kid 2 that was to be my travel companion is currently out of a job and if the interviews go the right way he will be moving away in the next 4-6 months.

There was a ridiculous conversation with my mother who said that she would go with me.  Good Lord.  I would rather chew off my own leg than travel alone with her for 2 weeks.  This is the person that thinks “The only reason people go to Boston Pizza is to get drunk”. Uhm what??  No mom, it’s a family pizza and pasta place that has a separate bar area.  “I KNOW why people go there” she tells me.  No mom, you don’t.  She really believes that she knows things that the rest of the world doesn’t.  She also knows what people are thinking apparently.  Mom, you don’t know what people think - “Oh YES I DO”. When I asked her if she thought she was psychic she glared at me.  I told her to use her special powers to win the lottery and walked away.  She’s bananas and so is my dad who doesn’t disagree with a single piece of crap that comes out of her mouth.  Taking pills is a sign of weakness to her, so my hypothyroidism that has to be treated with a pill is something that makes her roll her eyes.  My neck and shoulder injury that were confirmed years ago with MRI happened because I don’t walk enough.   It’s endless.  I’m almost 50 and this has been going on since I have memory of anything.  I’m so glad that I don’t live any closer than they do!!  My dad has actually said to me that he doesn’t know why they don’t have any friends!  I wanted to say to ask mom why - as she is the psychic, but also  racist, homophobic, misogynistic, narcissistic people have trouble in that area I guess.
I’m grateful for my little family and I try to steer clear of all their foolishness.

Back to my own business and real life...
I did a preliminary run through of our taxes.  This year with the Carbon Tax rebate the dh doesn’t have to pay anything.  I will be getting $1150 back and don’t have to buy any RRSP’s.  That is great! I will put more money into my TFSA’s as I have quite a bit of room yet.  I will do $15k for this year.  Keeping some savings ready for travel.  Hopefully to give us a quick get away for a week so that spring will come sooner.


I have bought a couple of things that I didn’t need, but wanted.  Only some jeans and boots.  Both of which I wear to work all of the time.  Thankfully I have a scaled back dress code.  Mostly because a lady that is part time in our office only wears jeans and t-shirts.  So my dark jeans and blouses and sweaters look just fine.

I’m off to do a school pick-up as it is -30 with the windchill and understandable how  kid 3 isn’t enthusiastic about walking!!

Things that suck:
Numerous cold temperature records

Things that are great:
Sunshine
Yoga
Meditating
Simple Tax to do my tax returns!

The Bank of Mom

I always thought that infants and kids would be the hardest part of raising a child.  LOL!!

It is physically demanding and they have 1000’s of books to resource on sleeping, eating, behaviour, learning... not so much with kids in their 20’s.

This week my oldest encountered dental issues that had to be taken care of.  $1900 of surgery issues and $50 of medications.  This office doesn’t bill insurance, you have to send it in after the fact.  But when you don’t have $1900 available on your credit card (because your limit is $1800) and you don’t have that much cash...Mom to the rescue.

There will be reimbursement of likely $800-900 by the insurance, but that is it.  The importance of having some extra money around is very clear.  While I was getting medications I thought that the fridge was pretty low on fluids for someone that can’t eat solids, so I added smoothies, ginger ale, sports drinks, broth soups.  I’m so happy that I could do that.  30 years ago I needed a huge surgery to have my wisdom teeth out.  I was hospitalized.  My parental units wouldn’t help with a penny of the cost.  It was $800.  They also felt no need to be with me.  My sibling had all of her dental work through high school and college including COSMETIC paid out of pocket by my parents.  I didn’t even see a dentist between the ages of 12-20.  I couldn’t imagine treating my kids so differently.
I guess that is how they saved money.  Pretend that you only have one child.

We have been trapped inside with very cold temperatures here for the last week.  I would really like to get away on vacation.  It hasn’t been booked yet.  Waiting for some dates we have to be at home added to the calendar.  The dh has been on his yearly diet/fitness try for all of January.  He’s not happy with the scale, but his digestive issues are so much better without a pail of Diet Pepsi and a bag of chips every day. (Go figure).  Kid 3 is enjoying the fitness equipment that we’ve bought.  Very dedicated to exercising daily.  So that is nice. It gives dh a workout partner too!  The rap music pumping through the house is a bit much for me and the dog but we will survive!  LOL.

Kid 1 has been texting me and looks to be recovering really well.  I’m relieved.  That is the part that I worry about, not the money.

I had a huge find in my “Clean and Purge” last week.  In a drawer were 5 gift cards (to the same place) and I didn’t know if they had money on them.  I took them into the store yesterday - $100!!  Wowza!  Happy day for me! I already know that I will use this for a xmas present for one of the kids for next year.

Have a good week!

The good things:
Having money in the bank  of Mom
Having appreciative kids
Finding $$

Things that suck:
Painful dental work
Having to pay for painful dental work
-40 windchill

2019 Simple and Splurges

This is my personal splurge year.

I bought a new iPad and a keyboard to attach.  The keyboard takes a bit of adjustment compared to my one at work, but I like being able to type normally.  I’m also able to add pictures now, and comment easier on others blogs.  I bought a lamp for my livingroom so that I can see to read in the evenings.  I bought a printer so that kid#3 can do homework easier, we bought a home gym so that kid#3 and dh can do workouts at home instead of the $50 a month gym.

Our Christmas was small.  Just us and and kids.  I prefer that now instead of trying to make uncomfortable chit chat with jerk family. I took a week off work to relax and catch up on sleep.  I averaged 2 hours of extra sleep a day!!
I did a shwack of baking.  (That means a ton). Cookies and squares mostly.  And 2/3 of it was gifts for the neighbours.

I got lovely gifts that I appreciate and enjoy from DH and the kids.  My parents gave $$ which is good and my MIL gave me a gift card.  She also gave me a horrid smelly candle.  Somehow it made its way into a donation pile 😉. I actually got 5 candles for xmas, plus a wax melting pot. (Maybe my house stinks??)

Dh and I talked about taking the 3 of us on a hot holiday.  It will be to Mexico.  Not visiting the US until there is a change in government.  Like almost all of my co-workers as well.  Canadian politics is bad, but hoo boy, what a circus going on (not a fun one to watch either) I am sick to death of that con man on our t.v.

It is soon 7 years that I have been mortgage free!!  I am planning my retirement date already.  Freedom 55 here I come!!  Because I am only working part time it does take quite a bit of planning to reach the numbers that I need to make that a reality.  The markets are doing very poor these days, so this year I am doing my TFSA (Tax Free Savings Account) in a GIC.  Super low interest rate, but safe and will be short term and hopefully reinvest in a year or 2 when the markets are doing better.

2019 will be the year that I free myself from many things.  I am cleaning and purging many aspects.  Both physical and emotional.  I have too much stuff, too much baggage.  Too many things in the way, too many things holding me down, too much that I keep- just in case.
Simple makes me happy.  I don’t like things complicated and intense anymore.  I get exhausted from almost nothing.  I have to pace myself all of the time.  It is my new normal.

Right now I am enjoying the flock of birds in my backyard chirping away as they jostle for space at my bird feeder.  My $2 feeder and $6 of birdseed have given hours of enjoyment!  Sparrows, chickadees and blue jays seem to be my most frequent visitors.

They aren’t the most beautiful birds, but they sing happily.  

I also have enjoyed this morning’s snow.  Soft and fluffy, making everything look clean.  I had to run a quick trip to get some laundry fabric softener as I was out.  I don’t dry my clothes in the dryer and they get a bit “crispy” without it.  Sometimes I will throw the air dried clothes into the dryer with a fabric softener sheet, but that is just an extra step that I don’t wan’t to do.  

Well, no reason to procrastinate doing the laundry now... so off I go!

Happy 2019 to everyone!! 

The Good Things:

My little family

My grown kids that thank me for what I did for them when they were little.

Costco Sweet Potato Crackers (Man I LOVE these)

Things that Suck:

My parental units

Aches, pains and exhaustion.

Christmas Budget

The Christmas season is in full swing, whether I’m ready or not. So I am trying to be ready!

I used to buy things for everyone that I agonized over, and I always spent more than I should have.  It would take me forever to find “the perfect” gift.  I used to search for what I thought was a meaningful small tree ornament in addition to a present to go to my nieces and nephew each year.  Not a single one of them mentioned even a thank you.  The year after my sibling gave my 2 oldest kids empty gift cards and then didn’t apologize or replace them, I said enough.  We don’t need to exchange gifts thank you!  My parents don’t like anything and the house is packed to the rafters with crap.  I have for several years bought them a food basket. Filled with locally made jams, chocolate, teas, honey, etc.  My Dad informed me that they don’t like any of it because it doesn’t taste as good as Mom can make.  She hasn’t made jam in 15 years, but sure.  Glad he told me and I don’t have to waste my time and money anymore.

I had to see them last weekend.  My youngest and I went out for supper with them.  It was embarrassing how racist and obnoxious my father is.  I was told after they left “Mom, I don’t know how you even came from people like that?!”  Thank you. Biggest compliment I’ve had in a long while.  They don’t change, they like exactly how they are.

So back in my world... Christmas is very low key.  The decorations are pared down and simple.  We put up a real tree with about 1/4 of the decorations that I used to.  I bought a poinsettia from costco for $20. That is that.  The kids are getting only a couple gifts. The oldest is getting a set of pots and pans, with some of my recipes in a book. $300. Middle is getting new glasses and sunglasses $300+ Youngest is getting some sports stuff $200. I have got dh shoes and will get a couple neckties. $200. Still debating about concert tickets. $100-180 But I think he might be in Vancouver that week.  I will have to check tonight.

I would love to get family pictures done as my gift. But others aren’t as enthusiastic about that as I am 😀

My job has been better the last month.  There is supposed to be another person joining us in the office which is good.  I’m still looking for something else but for now I enjoy my schedule.
Time for after school snacks, do my wild hair for a work supper tonight, take the laundry out and pull out my ironing board.

Busy, but not.  Just rolling with things these days and trying to avoid stress.  Meditate and find some zen!

Postpone and Pay

Sometimes when you put things off for too long you end up paying more than you would have.

Today is that day for me.  We are getting a new garage door.  Ours has broke 4 times.  The last fix, the repairman said it couldn't be fixed again.  The door has warped and the weather stripping has torn from ice and snow.  Had it been replaced a few years ago it probably wouldn't cost this much.

I have also put off going to the dentist.  For over a year.  My last dentist that I had for 15 years moved away.  I liked him, I could keep my anxiety under control.  Now I know I have a cavity.  My first one since elementary school. It is going to cost both extra money and pain because I put off check up and cleaning.

I have made some money on the side selling winter wear that is too small for kid 3.  The local facebook selling group has been really easy to use and nice normal people have come to the door.  I have used kijiji a lot in the past and I find there are too many flakes that waste my time.  Unless it is free!  Then people beat a path to the door!  I used the cash for October spending money.  So that saved me $80.

We went on vacation and it was over so fast.  It wasn't as relaxing as I needed.  I was very tired and my back killing me when we got home. We did see beautiful sights, drink perfect wine and had great meals.

Being mentally and physically exhausted is my new normal.  Yoga and meditation help a lot.  Medication helps but, this is how I am now.  Physio is $500+ a month.  I think sitting in the sun on a beach would help as much as anything.  I shall keep dreaming.

I have worked more this year than I did last.  I have already passed my last years total wage, so I guess the next month and a half are all gravy.

I do plan to treat myself to a new iPad.  This is the one I bought when I paid off my mortgage in 2012.  It's time for an upgrade.  I'm buying some xmas gifts this weekend to take advantage of the sales.  I also have to buy a new hair straightener as mine died Tuesday.  I had to invent a new very curly hair style at 6:50 am before I left at 7!!

The dh comes back from a business trip tonight.  We have sports all weekend with kid 3.  There is no school tomorrow and neither of us work so I am praying for a sleep in morning!  Time for more coffee, the laundry isn't doing itself and the garage door people should be here soon.

The good things:
No mortgage
Hardly any snow
Money to pay for sh!t we need

Things that suck:
Cavities
Depression
No sunshine
My work that pays well is killing my soul.

School Supplies and Shuttle driver

I'm afraid that fall is in the air.  I'm not done with summer yet 😞 .  The other morning you could see your breath outside.
This is my 20th year for buying school supplies.  Yes, 20 years I've been doing this.  This is my first year that supplies cost ZERO!  That's right, nothing!  All required supplies were still left over from the last few years.  Binders from last year are still good, pencil case and all writing implements ready. I may have to get mechanical pencils by xmas, will see.
All kid 3 wanted for school clothes was a new pair of pants and a pair of shoes.  The pants were a quick $55 but the shoes were hard to find.  Mens 7.5 is not an easy size to come across.  Finally found some size 8's that met the fashion/athletic criteria. They are big, but not for long.  He has been golfing lots this summer and enjoying it.  I have been driving to golf course to hockey rink to hair cut to friends house to next place and next place.  I should drive uber.

Physiotherapy has been helping immensely this summer.  I've also started yoga and meditating.  Turning hippie, and I like it!

I got an e-mail from my employer that I have 120 hours of vacation to use by March.  Shall do! 😄
Dh is talking about Mexico this winter.  I am all for it.  Just need to figure out dates that work.

This year, just like last September is going to be crazy.  My dh is working extra at work and has an outside work project.  I might see him 3 evenings next month.  Kid 3 has tons of sports so I will be the driver as per usual.  There is a class I would like to do that is 1 night a week for an hour.  I'm telling dh and kid3 and I bet they kick up a fuss.  Funny how an hour a week for mom is the end of the world!

I have to get rolling!  A kid will be waiting for pick-up, and food, and shower.  I am just glad he's busy doing stuff that isn't video games!

I need to do a huge grocery and Costco run.  Not looking forward to it!  I better do a few meal plans today too.

The good things:
$0 for supplies
Healthy athletic kids

Things that suck:
My creepy bil and his family are in town
Why can't I have nice family that live close?!

And the days fly by.

Working full time for the last 3 weeks has left me very tired.  We had a conference that was exhausting.  I ended up presenting for a morning.  Winging it by the seat of my pants.  I wasn't even supposed to attend that session.  My boss had a meltdown.  She sat with her head in her hands, or my favourite- pulled 24 water bottles out of the plastic into a big bucket and then dumped ice and shimmied each bottle around WHILE people were presenting and trying to talk!!!  Not getting the hint after the 3rd "pardon me?" When we couldn't hear each other.  I found it quite comical after awhile.  She didn't like that one of our bosses from "head office" had invited themselves and it was a display of passive aggressiveness that was a spectacle!  After work each day dh and I had a cold drink, I replayed the childish antics and we laughed and laughed about her bizarre behaviour.
Oooh lordy I need to find another position!

What was good about it was briefly networking with others, and best of all was the full time pay :)

The heat has been great.  We hit 100 degrees last week.  If only the smokey skies would clear.  I was out for only 3/4 hour today and started coughing.  My throat is sore too.  So I have the a/c pumping and I'm going to make a rhubarb cake.  My rhubarb plant that I got from a friend is growing gangbusters.  I love the taste of rhubarb.  It reminds me of my Grandma.  She was such an amazing baker.  I miss her.

My weeding and rhubarb harvesting must have been too physical for my back as my fingers are numb now.  Taking it easy seems to be on the agenda today now. I will, once the cake is baking.

I ran into a sweet lady that lived down the street from me when I was a child.  She's in her 80's now.  She recognized me instantly.  I haven't seen her more than once in the last 28 years.  She is still sweet to me.  One of her sons and I are facebook friends, she doesn't talk to him because he's gay.  I don't see that as a reason to not talk to your own child.  Like I said she is very kind towards me but I guess nobody knows what goes on behind closed doors.  Her son is a wonderful person, I wish we lived closer.  I would have him over for dinner.  I had such a crush on him when I was little! (Like I was 10 years old and he was 20) He looked like a Ken doll!  He's also smart and funny and kind.  I don't know why that wouldn't be enough for a Mom?

I don't know lots of things.

My oldest has found full time work for the next 8 months.  Hopefully it will become permanent.  Kid 2 is starting school again in the fall and still working full time.  Kid 3 has had the busiest summer of all, going with friends to their lake, sleepovers, camps, movies...it has been great!

The wind is crazy now, maybe it will blow some smoke away so I can go outside?  Hopefully.

Enjoy the summer!!